I want a passport

Well, it’s official. There ain’t gonna be a panto this year. I’ve just written the announcement. 

I can’t pretend I was wild about the script (a version of Peter Pan, written by a local author), because I wasn’t. But I was looking forward to there being something that would get me out of the house and socialising with others three times a week as the days get shorter and shorter, leading inexorably towards the black dog days of winter.

It all seemed possible a couple of months ago when the board were agreeing to a 2021/22 season. We could do it safely. Everyone who worked backstage and everyone who auditioned for a role would need to provide proof of vaccination. Anti-vaxxers need not apply.

But the bastards won. Or, more accurately, the bastards are ruining things for everyone else.

This chart is from San Diego.

It could be from pretty much anywhere in North America. Wankers.

Meanwhile a federal election has been called in Canada. Has it even been two years since the last one? The one resulting in Justin Trudeau’s Liberals leading a minority government. Clearly he thinks he can win back a majority.

It was obvious it was coming. For the past month Justin’s been making a lot of noise and reaching agreements with various provincial governments about creating $10 a day daycare places. Oh, that old chestnut. Liberals always dig it out and polish it off when there’s an election in the offing. I don’t know if his father did, but I remember Chretien talking about it and all the various Liberal leaders during the Harper years. “Parents! Vote for us and get $10 a day daycare for your kids!” And after the election? Oops. Doesn’t happen. Suckers!

How about, Justin, instead of calling a cynical election, you did more to punish anti-vaxxers? I’m not talking about the people who have genuine medical conditions that preclude vaccination. I’m talking about the knuckleheads. How about you do a Macron? How about you start issuing vaccine passports (and exemption cards for the people with genuine conditions)? How about you tell the unvaccinated that they can stay the fuck away from planes and trains, from bars and restaurants, from theatres and galleries? 

Yes, yes, I know this isn’t France. I know Canada is a large country with various provincial and territorial governments who run their own healthcare systems. I know it’s up to the provinces to tell the tossers where they can (and can’t) go. But you could get on to the vaccine passport thing, couldn’t you, Justin? Or you could roll the dice, hope for a majority, promise affordable daycare for all, and call an election.

The intransigent are killing more than a panto on an island. But never mind. Have your election. Luckily for you, Justin, Mr Potato Head hasn’t gained much traction with voters since he took over as leader of the Conservatives. I hope your party fizzles, that you stay in minority, continue to need the support of the NDP and the Bloc. For the sake of Canada’s parents I hope you remember that 30-year-old affordable daycare promise after the votes are tallied. 

Oh, and get on that vaccine passport thing, will ya?