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Told you so

August 12, 2020

biden harris 2020

As I have already pointed out elsewhere, I manufactured this lawn sign on March 3rd.

I don’t honestly expect much from the Biden/Wankmaggot debate, but Harris eviscerating Pence is going to be a sight to behold. And treasure forever.

Before yesterday’s announcement, I’d been leaning more towards Susan Rice – even if it meant “Benghazi, Benghazi, Benghazi!” would be rolling 24/7 on Fox News and the lips of the Wankmaggot and his minions.

Of course the main reason I was leaning towards Rice as Biden’s veep pic was I really, really wanted him to pick Harris as his Attorney General. How sweet would that have been?

Not as sweet as my other big fantasy cabinet pick: Elizabeth Warren as Secretary of the Treasury. Can’t you imagine every banker and stockbroker in the country shitting themselves upon hearing that news? The party is over, boys. Oh, yes, I still have my fingers crossed. And there would be such lovely synchronicity, given that Warren only ran for Senate in the first place because Obama chickened out of appointing her the head of the consumer protection agency she’d just set up.

Who else might it be fun to see in the cabinet room?

How about Beto (“hell, yes, we’re going to take your AR-15s and AK-47s”) O’Rourke as Attorney General? I can see more soiled underwear with that announcement. On reflection, I think he’d be better as the director of immigration and customs enforcement or homeland security? Sweet.

Maybe it’s time for Susan Rice to get the job she was lined up for in 2012? She was the frontrunner to replace Hilary Clinton as secretary of state until “Benghazi, Benghazi, Benghazi!” erupted. Although it would also make me smile (and give almost every other Republican apoplexy) if Biden appointed Mitt Romney to the role.

Greta Thunberg is too young to appoint as head of the environmental protection agency. Even if she wasn’t too young, like any sensible person, she wouldn’t want to actually live in the United States. How about former Washington governor Jay Inslee, whose short presidential bid was determinedly focussed on only one issue: climate change? Oil addicts and frackers beware!

Oh, hang on. I know who the AG should be: Preet Bharara, former (before he was fired) US attorney for the Southern District of New York. It is, after all, SDNY that has all those lovely subpoenas lined up to serve the Wankmaggot as soon as he’s out of office. Sweet, sweet, sweet.

Secretary of Education? Well, what the hell? Biden promised at one of the debates that he would appoint a teacher to the role. His wife Jill (who certainly hasn’t been backwards coming forwards with criticism of the DeVos nightmare) was actually a teacher. Pick her and watch Republicans (who’ve never once questioned the roles of Ivanka and Jared in the White House) hypocritically lose their shit.

Department of Labour? Ohio senator Sherrod Brown – the guy I actually really, really wanted to run for the Democratic nomination. Why Brown for the job? Read this.

And while I’m in what the hell mode, let’s make Bernie Sanders head of the department of health and human services.

Other suggestions? Do, please, use the comment box below.

Of course all this fantasising presupposes that the Wankmaggot doesn’t just steal the election, which he’s hellbent on doing.

It’s unlikely the UN will be allowed to send election monitors to every state – especially the Republican ones – although frankly they should be there. Aleksandr Lukashenko of Belarus has got nothing on the Wankmaggot.

So, sane Yanks (I know you exist), order your mail in ballot, fill it out and send it back as soon as you can, ‘cause…

 

From → Columns

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