Phew

Fingers have been uncrossed, deep breaths exhaled. The dimpled devil is not the new Canadian prime minister. And that is the most important thing. It’s Prime Minister Blackface again, which is better than the most likely alternative.

The pollsters called it. A Liberal minority government. Would that they had been so accurate in 2016. If they’d been right then, Brexit wouldn’t have been tearing the UK apart for three and a half years and Hillary Clinton would be the President of the United States. Oh, for that alternative reality.

Other notable outcomes from yesterday’s election?

The Greens can now claim to be a nationwide party. As of today they have one MP in New Brunswick and two on Vancouver Island. Nothing in between, mind, other than successes in splitting the progressive votes in a number of ridings. It’s so nice to know Elizabeth May will have company in the House of Commons. It’s been lonely for her.

Voters in Quebec are fickle. Quelle surprise! The 2011 orange wave that turned decidedly red in 2015 went pale blue last night. The Bloc Quebecois are back, now with the third largest number of seats.

As the pundits were quick to point out on CBC last night, the blue meanies don’t seem to be able gain any real traction outside the west. With the exception of Edmonton Strathcona, that longstanding progressive anomaly in Alberta which once again went to the NDP, the entire maps of Alberta and Saskatchewan are now blue. (The transformation of Saskatchewan, the first Canadian province to elect a social democratic government, into CRAP central is a very sad state of affairs.) Apparently Alberta is apoplectic today that “their” party, which did win more actual votes, is not forming government. Too bad, so sad. Get over it.

Oh, and Jody Wilson-Raybould is the newly elected Independent MP for Vancouver Granville. Sweet.

Closer to home: my guy didn’t win. My riding had the opportunity to elect a man with a proven track record on environmental and social justice issues, a man whose election would have been a small, but much needed step towards addressing the woeful underrepresentation of First Nations peoples in Parliament. Instead of electing him, the majority of voters in my riding opted for the white guy on the Green posters. Fair enough. Not only will Elizabeth May now have people to sit with in the House of Commons, but now she’ll also have someone to sit with on her flights to and from Ottawa. (I’m pretty sure neither of them are going to opt to take the train.)

The voters have spoken. The dimpled devil isn’t the prime minister. With a push from the NDP, the Liberal minority government might even introduce a government dental care plan. Could have been so much worse. Phew.